The theory of parental alienation has never been scientifically proven valid. Yet many courts and litigators treat it as though it has. The belief behind it is that one parent can influence their child to turn against the other parent through their actions and words.
The United Nations is so concerned about the worldwide rise in claims of parental alienation that they have commissioned a report into it. They fear that divorce litigators are weaponizing it, and judges in divorce cases are believing them, putting children’s lives at risk.
How does it work?
Your spouse wants more custody when you divorce (or at some point after). Therefore, they make a claim of parental alienation to the court. They say that you are trying to turn the child against them and are trying to brainwash the child to think that they are a bad parent.
If they make their story convincing enough, and the judge believes that parental alienation is a real psychological condition, you could see your share of parenting time cut drastically.
A loss of parenting time is not the only problem
If your child claims their other parent abuses them, there’s a good chance it is true. If the abusive parent convinces the judge that it is all a fantasy you inserted into the child’s mind, it frees them to continue the abuse and perhaps expand it. If the judge takes parenting time away from you, you will be less able to protect your child.
Seeking legal to fight your custody case gives you the best chance of fighting back against false claims of parental alienation and giving your child the protection they need.
plan to marry. Despite your best intentions, you may find yourself in an untenable situation. Maybe the two of you have opposing political opinions and can no longer even converse civilly with each other. Perhaps your spouse cheated on you, and you know you will never forgive them.
You believe that divorce is likely the appropriate solution, but you’ve probably heard horror stories from other people who decided to end their marriage or got served unexpectedly by their spouse. It’s natural to worry about what will happen with your finances after you file for divorce, especially if you’re close to retirement age.
Are your retirement savings at risk in an Arizona divorce?
Community property rules apply to almost everything
Part of promising to spend your life with someone else is the tacit agreement to pool your assets and cover each other’s financial obligations. Unless you have a marital agreement, what you earned during marriage is marital property, so the contributions from your paycheck to your retirement savings are also marital property.
What you contributed before your marriage or after a formal separation won’t be at risk, but you could very well have to divide your account in half to share with your spouse under Arizona’s community property laws.
How can you protect your retirement account?
You and your spouse have the option of negotiating an agreement and settling property division matters on your own. If retaining the full balance of your retirement account is your biggest goal in your divorce, you can make that your priority during negotiations or mediation. You might allow your ex to keep other assets, like your small family business, to make up for the value of your retirement account.
If you can settle matters on your own, you can potentially reach any arrangement that works for both of you. Otherwise, a judge will order the division of your retirement account along with other property in accordance with Arizona state statute. Learning about the rules that apply in property division matters can help those contemplating divorce in Arizona.
Should you pursue child custody out of court?
Litigating child custody can be overwhelming. At the end of the day, important decisions regarding your child’s upbringing will be determined by the judge who has absolutely no clue about your family dynamics. With this in mind, it is not uncommon for divorcing couples to wonder whether they can settle child custody out of court.
A simple answer is, YES– you can settle child custody out of court. In fact, Arizona child custody laws encourage parents to work out custody and visitation plans on their own without involving the court.
If this is something you want to consider, then it is important that you understand how to go about this sensitive subject.
Important considerations when settling child custody out of court
Coming up with a solid parenting plan is essential whether or not you are going to settle your child custody in or out of court. Here are some of the factors you need to consider when negotiating an out-of-court child custody settlement:
The type of custody
This is probably the first step in reaching a custody settlement. Depending on the child’s needs, parents’ abilities and availability as well as each household’s living arrangements, you can opt for shared custody or full custody to one parent as the other gets visitation rights.
The child’s education and extra-curricular activities
Consistency in education is crucial for the child. Thus, compelling the child to change schools, and possibly the environment, in the middle of the year can not only be disruptive but an unnecessary hindrance as well.
The custody arrangement you come up with may address how both parents will be involved in the child’s education (studying, homework and school events) as well as extra-curricular activities. It could also address other concerns like the child’s holidays.
Divorce is a major life event for everyone involved. As soon as you decide to divorce, it is important that you begin working out a plan for your child’s custody and living arrangement going forward.
You’re done! Your marriage is over, and you are getting a divorce. If divorce is inevitable, one of the issues you will need to work out is the division of your marital property according to Arizona laws. If you have a home, it will likely be a contentious issue during the property division process.
Should you fight to keep the family home? It likely means so much to you for a variety of reasons, some of which may be sentimental. That being said, it is important that you are realistic about your decision to ask for the home when dividing marital property. Here are two questions you need to ask:
1. Can you afford it?
From paying the mortgage to home insurance, property taxes and regular maintenance costs, a lot goes into owning a home. In a two-income household, you were probably cost-sharing some of these expenses. However, on your own, you may experience difficulty affording the expenses that come with home ownership. If you cannot afford the home, you simply shouldn’t fight for it. Keep in mind that divorce will leave you with a separate bill to settle.
2. Will you have to refinance the mortgage?
Did you and your ex take out the mortgage on the home together? If this is the case, then the only way you can remove their name from the home is by selling or refinancing it. Most often, the mortgage lender will not remove your spouse from the mortgage contract simply because you are divorced. That leaves you with the refinancing option, which can be quite costly.
Divorce can be emotionally draining. Find out how you can protect your rights and interests while going through the divorce.
Divorce signals several new starts. During the divorce process, one of the issues the court will take seriously and rule on is the child’s post-divorce living arrangements.
When the family court pronounces the terms of the child custody order, it is imperative that both parents respect it. Unfortunately, things do not always go as intended. Of course, there may be isolated instances when your ex may delay dropping off the kids by 20 minutes. But what happens when your ex is routinely and deliberately undermining the child custody order?
Steps to take if your spouse is not following a child custody order
Pretty much every child custody ruling is made in the best interests of the child. Thus, if your spouse is violating a custody order, you have a right to take legal action against them. However, before going to court, here are two things you need to do:
1. Document the violations
It is important that you create a comprehensive journal of the specific violation incidents. These should include the nature of the violation as well as the specific date it happened. For instance, if you were unable to visit your child because the custodial parent moved out of town with them, then be sure to document this.
2. Discuss the violation with your ex
Some violations may be unintentional. For instance, your ex’s new work or schooling schedule might be clashing with the agreed visitation hours. In this case, you may wish to hold a discussion with your ex to establish the root cause of the violation and figure out how things can be fixed.
Co-parenting isn’t always easy after the divorce. Find out how you can safeguard your rights and interests while litigating a child custody case.
When you’re getting a divorce, financial issues can end up being the hardest ones to untangle – and that’s when everybody plays fair.
What happens, then, when one spouse is willing to take a “scorched earth” approach to the family finances rather than share with the other? When a spouse intentionally wastes marital property, that’s called the dissipation of marital assets.
Here are 4 common ways that spouses dissipate marital assets
People can be endlessly creative about the ways they waste money and other assets. However, there are a few common scenarios that crop up over and over again:
- Gambling: Sometimes a spouse would rather blow all their money at the poker tables than split the money in the divorce.
- Luxury purchases: A spouse may decide that since life as they know it is ending, they may as well spend like the entire world is ending, too. Blowing all the marital money on expensive rounds of drinks and other consumable luxuries may seem like a great way to “get even” with the spouse they blame for their troubles.
- Wanton destruction: Sometimes a spouse will purposefully destroy something rather than split it, so a victimized spouse comes home to find that prize vehicles were wrecked or valuable paintings were slashed.
- Affairs: Sometimes the dissipation of marital assets has more to do with a spouse’s new love interest than a desire for revenge. Just the same, spending a lot of marital money on jewelry, vacations and other gifts for their new partner is another way to injure their spouse financially.
Asset dissipation has the net effect of depriving the victimized spouse of their fair share of the marital pot – unless the victimized spouse fights back. Addressing the dissipation with the court
can result in a larger share of what remains to balance things out or a judgment against your spouse that requires them to reimburse you. Experienced legal guidance can help you achieve a positive outcome to your case.
How do you split home equity in an Arizona divorce?
The home where you live is probably your most valuable asset, with the possible exception of retirement savings or a small business you own. You and your spouse have probably invested thousands of dollars in mortgage payments in the last year alone, to say nothing of your down payment and the improvements you have made to the property.
The investments you have made in your home may be your biggest deterrent when considering a divorce. Although the Arizona real estate market is strong, you may worry about losing your share of the equity in the home and not being able to buy a new house later.
Thankfully, that is not a realistic concern for most divorcing adults. Arizona’s community property rules help protect your interest in the home. You have a right to your share of the home equity. How do you potentially divide that equity when you divorce?
By refinancing the home
A judge can order that one of you will keep the marital home. Typically, doing so requires that you execute and record a deed. The spouse keeping the home will also need to refinance the property so that the other spouse is not on the new mortgage. They can use that refinance process to cash out equity and pay their spouse for half of what the home is worth.
By retaining other assets
Instead of directly dividing the home equity through refinancing, you may be able to request your share of equity in the form of other property. An investment account or retirement savings fund could be worth enough to offset the value of your home equity. So could a small business that you started during the marriage. You could also ask your ex to assume more marital debt to achieve the same goal.
By selling the home
Sometimes, it just doesn’t make sense to have one of the spouses keep the marital home, especially if they don’t have much equity accrued in the property yet. Either through mutual agreement or court order, you may need to sell the home and then divide the proceeds from that sale with your ex.
Any of these approaches can help ensure you receive your fair share of home equity in an upcoming Arizona divorce. Learning more about the rules for community property division will help you protect yourself as you negotiate or litigate your divorce.
In Arizona, all new divorcing parents and unmarried parents with custody disputes regarding minor children must attend an educational program focused on their children’s needs.
These courses are designed to help parents learn the proper way to help children cope with the changes that are happening in their lives. One of the main driving factors behind these courses is the huge emotional and mental toll a divorce can on children.
Some of the ways divorce can negatively impact a child’s life are found here:
Poor academic performance
As children try to understand how the dynamics of their family are changing, they may become confused and distracted. The changes can impact their focus and academic performance.
Reduced interest in social activities
Divorce can also impact children socially. They may have a harder time relating to children their age and have fewer social contacts (friends). Many children even feel insecure and wonder if their family is the only one that is going through this challenging time.
Problems adapting to change
During a divorce, children will have to adapt to change frequently. This may include a new living situation, new school and more. All this can affect their sense of security and well-being.
Emotional sensitivity
Children will begin to feel many emotions during divorce. While each child is unique, some of these emotions include anger, anxiety, confusion, loss and more. This transition period can also leave children feeling emotionally sensitive and overwhelmed.
Helping your children through divorce
The required parenting education courses will give parents the tools needed to help guide their children through this difficult time and ensure their best interests are protected. During a divorce, there are other legal aspects you must deal with too, and knowing your legal rights and responsibilities is a must to get through this process.
Arizona has a “Good Samaritan” law that protects people who seek emergency medical assistance for someone suffering a drug overdose from prosecution for their own drug possession and use at the time. This applies both to those who seek help for someone else and those who get help for their own overdose.
The Arizona Opioid Epidemic Act, which was enacted in Jan. 2018, was designed to help curb the rising number of overdose fatalities throughout the state. Too often, overdose victims are left to die by people who were afraid to call 911 because they are using illegal drugs themselves. Sometimes, people won’t even get medical help when they need it for fear they’ll end up in jail once they’re released from the hospital.
What is covered under the law?
While you should always seek medical help for someone experiencing an overdose, regardless of the consequences, it’s important to know what the law does and doesn’t cover. According to the law, someone who seeks medical help in good faith for a drug-related overdose “may not be charged or prosecuted for the possession or use of a controlled substance or drug paraphernalia or a preparatory offense if the evidence for the violation was gained as a result of the person’s seeking medical assistance.” The law defines “medical assistance” as “to call 911 or otherwise contact law enforcement, poison control or a hospital emergency department.”
Immunity applies only to the offenses listed in the law. For example, if the police show up at the scene with paramedics and find stolen goods or other illegal activity, they can still arrest and potentially charge someone. However, under the law, the fact that you sought medical help “may be used as a mitigating factor” in your case.
It’s important to remember that the details of these immunity laws vary by state. However, it’s never the wrong decision to seek help for someone whose life may be in danger. Leaving the scene could have far more serious criminal consequences.
If you believe that you were charged with a drug-related crime for which you should have had immunity, it’s wise to seek legal guidance. Even if the charges are warranted, the fact that an offense was discovered because you sought medical help for someone should be considered.
Parenting time does not always have to be a shared
Every parent has a right to be involved in their children’s lives. It’s typically beneficial to the children when both parents work together. This is why courts prefer shared custody arrangements where both parents are involved.
However, sharing parenting time and decision making are not guaranteed in custody cases. If it could put the child’s interests and welfare at risk, the court will usually award sole custody to one parent.
Are the children at risk?
Suppose your spouse was violent or was abusing drugs, spurring the divorce, and you don’t feel the children are safe with them. Alternatively, they may have been neglectful of the kids, and their parental skills are questionable.
In cases like this, you can seek sole parenting time. Children always come first, and the court will decide accordingly. In mild cases, the judge may order supervised visits to protect the child while ensuring the other parent is involved.
However, the other parent may be completely blocked from accessing the children if need be. In such a case, one of the parents will get sole decision-making authority and parenting time with the kids.
What do you need to secure sole parenting time?
Decisions on parenting time are not gender-based, and judges are not quick to jump to conclusions without evidence. Some divorcing couples falsely accuse each other due to bad blood between them in a bid to sway court decisions.
Therefore, you need to support your claims by furnishing the court with relevant information such as communication records or witness testimony. Anything that shows the court that your children will not be safe around the other parent will go a long way in convincing them.
You are likely to face resistance from your spouse if you seek sole custody. However, you should be prepared to fight for your children’s safety
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