Initiating a conversation about your divorce with your child can be challenging. It can be stressful to inform them about the reality they are about to face. Nonetheless, you need to handle the talk carefully, as it can determine how your child views the divorce or copes with their new life.
Here are three tips to consider:
1. Plan what to say
If possible, you and your soon-to-be spouse should hold the talk together. You need to agree on what to say beforehand. Decide how to start the discussion, the reasons to give for the divorce and how to answer your child’s questions.
Not planning what to say can result in you overwhelming your child with details they may not need to know or making promises you might not be able to keep. Preparing allows you to deliver a clear message, protecting your child from confusion.
Consider your child’s age
You need to have an age-appropriate conversation with your child. So, when planning what to say, you should consider your child’s age to provide them with details they can understand.
For example, while it may be appropriate to tell a teenager the reasons for the separation because they may ask for it, a five-year-old may only need to know that their parents will no longer live together.
Prepare for your child’s reaction
You need to be ready for your child’s reaction. They may be sad, angry or confused when you break the news to them. It’s vital to know how to help them manage their emotions. Encourage them to express their feelings during the talk and afterward.
Going through a divorce with a child is different. You need to make informed decisions from the word go to minimize the effects of the divorce on your child.